Be Still and Know

I tend to live my life in a perpetual state of what’s next.  I had an Akashic reading recently.  If you are unfamiliar, you can read about Akashic Records here.  During the reading I asked my guides what lesson my soul is here to learn. I promise, I was expecting an earth shattering discovery.  My answer was anything but. The answer pissed me off.  And made me laugh.  Patience.  My soul is on this Earth to learn patience. I mean, who the fuck doesn’t want to learn patience?!    It got a bit better when my guides told me that I should also know that my intuition is one of my greatest gifts and I shouldn’t let my head get in the way of what my heart knows.   The reading was 90 minutes.  I can sum it up here in four words.  “Be still and Know.”  Not sure I needed the reading for that, but it’s always a good reminder.  I have a tendency to want to move on to the next thing.  I will love a thing and love it and love it some more.  Until I don’t.  Then I’m done.  My husband is thrilled that I have stuck with “The yoga thing.”  The “yoga thing” is what centers me.  It’s not going anywhere. In fact, it could be that I’ve outgrown being either all in or all out. I’ll have to take a deeper look at that.  Yoga has definitely opened me up to a world of things to fall in love with.  Things I hated in the beginning.  Dancing and Kirtan being at the top of the list.  But, you may remember, I also hated yoga in the beginning.  For a LONG time.  We all know how that story goes.  So what’s next? Retreats. I have plans for several women’s retreats. A Recovery retreat and a Rebel Soul Sister Retreat. What’s next might also be school. Real school. I have been sitting with that for quite a while now and I still haven’t committed. Maybe putting it here on the blog will give me a push.  Sometimes things take me a few years.  Sometimes they happen overnight.  What’s next could be writing a book.  That one has been on my mind far longer than school.  At one point I was sure this would be the year. Both of those things terrify the shit out of me for very different reasons.  I know I’m capable of doing either of those things. Fear doesn’t stop me from doing things. Just waiting for the nudge. The big one that I can’t ignore. For right now, my what’s next is as simple as a new practice.  Ashtanga Yoga.  Ashtanga is a beautiful and challenging practice that I have been interested in for years.  I have never practiced due to a lack local teachers.  At yoga church last week, my teacher mentioned that she was taking an Ashtanga workshop. That opened up a conversation about the practice. That same evening, a friend commented on one of my FB posts and mentioned a Shala in Wilmington. Shala implies Ashtanga. So I went to Google and sure enough there’s a Shala in Wilmington. Apparently, it’s been there for years but completely off my radar. I immediately emailed the place and talked to the teacher. I made a plan to start this week. Then, as if I needed confirmation that I’m supposed to go, an Ashtanga yogi came to my class yesterday. She’s the only person I know who practices Ashtanga. She rarely comes to my classes and when she does, it’s clear that I’m not really teaching her anything. I love to watch her practice. So strong and beautiful! Having her there yesterday was an extra nudge from the Universe. I am excited to learn more about this practice and as weird as it sounds, I am excited about the discipline involved with it.  Those who know me, KNOW how excited I get. This is something I am super excited about. As of late I feel a bit off center and ungrounded.  Ashtanga is a daily commitment to come to my mat in a new way.  It will take my “morning practice” to a whole new level.  Chances are I will hate it.  😂  Yoga is moving meditation for me.  An opportunity to still my mind and tune into my body.  An opportunity to “be still and know.”  Whatever is next is definitely coming.  I will know what it is when the time is right and I will embrace it.   I will embrace the shit out of it, like I do. For now, I am getting a lesson in patience by resting in the “in between” and simply enjoying where I am.  Maybe that’s what the Akashic reading was about.  And really, what’s not to enjoy? 

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